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| Funtopia Review: |
Are you sitting comfortably? Good. Then we'll begin. How about "Abduction by Aliens" for starters, which one US survey estimates hundreds of thousands or more US citizens have been subjected to, and which some conspiracy theorists claim is actually down to 'ultra-secret human experimentation by the CIA'. Then there's the internet rumour about an "Army of the Dead", assembled by Islamic Fundamentalist agents, which consists of men who are either HIV positive or have full-blown AIDS to act as human bombs and carry out suicide missions, or how about "Chupacabra", a vampiric goat sucker, which reputedly terrorises livestock, and sometimes even attacks small children and adults, in Latin America, primarily Mexico. 'Listen with Mother' reading material this ain't then! It is, however, 239 pages of gripping, paranoia inducing, sometimes frightening, even amusing, but always interesting accounts that highlight, 'Our deepest secret fears, from the antichrist to the trenchcoat mafia'. Of course, all of the more well known conspiracy theories which one would expect in a book like this are here. The JFK and Bobby Kennedy assassinations, the Roswell Incident, and the CIA's attempts to overthrow Castro in the early 1960s, to name a few are dutifully trotted out. But there are also over 200 other entries which are not so common knowledge, and they range from the downright sinister to the plain trivial.
An example at the sinister end of the scale is "MKULTRA" (see also Mick Farren's The CIA Files: Secrets of the Company), which was the 'in-house' research group of the CIA in the 1950s whose brief was 'to explore the possibilities and techniques for controlling the human mind'. Sending people mad by clandestinely testing LSD on innocent dupes was just one of their ruses. Farren suggests that 'with MKULTRA, the CIA boldly went where no intelligence agency had gone before. The only possible exception was Hitler's Gestapo', such were the machinations of the MKULTRA boys. At the more trivial end of the scale are examples like the "Kentucky Fried Chicken" entry which explains how, after it was analyzed, the Colonel's famous secret recipe turned out to be 'nothing more than skim milk, flour, eggs, salt, black pepper, and plenty o' finger-licking monosodium glutamate'. Or another amusing entry under "Roaches" reads; 'As comedian Richard Belzer once remarked -"Only rats, roaches, and Keith Richards will survive a nuclear war"'. These more trivial and lighthearted entries act as humourous asides to the other more sinister and bizarre entries, and show that Mick is able to place his tongue firmly in his cheek when he wants to. Although Farren's approach is somewhat resemblant to Fox Mulder's open-mindedness to all manner of X-Files kinds of weirdness, he isn't averse to taking his cue from the Dana Scully School of Scepticism too. For example, when looking at two explanations for the "Chupacabra" (yeah, that goat sucker again!) he seems to poo-poo the idea that it is a bizarre extraterrestrial intruder. Why [would] an alien species, technically advanced enough to cross the massive distances between star systems...arrive at an inhabited planet and immediately start sucking goats. Unless, of course, the Chupacabra is an escaped alien pet or (by human standards) a particularly disgusting gatherer of organic samples.Farren admits that some of the entries are more 'urban legend' than conspiracy theory. Take the example of the "Mole People", who supposedly live in sewers, storm drains etc. under the major cities of the US, and are mutating into something other than human, organizing their own subterranean, Satanic religions, and developing 'such attributes as feline style night vision and webbed feet'. Not that Farren claims to vouch for the veracity of each story, he even goes as far as providing a pledge at the end of his introduction. We don't even suggest that every word is the gospel truth, although every entry has at some time been presented as gospel. What the reader believes or disbelieves is entirely up to her or him. All we can do is offer the following pledge.So, although many of the stories here are still matters of conjecture, stories which are too patently without substance are thankfully absent. One of the more recent stories which circulated on the internet and is certainly a matter of conjecture is the "Clinton Death List", which consists of of over thirty people connected with Bill Clinton who had died in suspicious circumstances, during and since Clinton's ascent to power in 1992. Despite already having said in the introduction; For no other reason than to avoid the sudden and mysterious demise of anyone connected with the publication of this book, no theories are presented or conspiracies speculated upon here. Just the facts ma'am, as Joe Friday used to say on Dragnet...Farren wisely refutes the veracity for the Clinton Death List entry by reiterating 'that there may not be a word of truth in it'. However, this is perhaps as much out of fear of possible legal recriminations as being bumped off mysteriously. Talking of being bumped off, Farren also mentions how the FBI quoted figures for professional hits at 5,000 in 1997 compared to 1,000 in 1980, and that the current rates for assassinations range between $5,000 and $10,000, whilst a real pro, who the mob might use, gets paid in excess of $100,000 a job. If the prices and credentials of a modern day hi-tech hitman don't grab you, how about using a "Sanguma"? From the highlands of Papua New Guinea, Sangumas are a cult of medicine men...[who] will commit murder for a price. These homicidal witch doctors, who are usually paid in livestock and trinkets , have a unique method of avoiding detection and disposing of their victims after the hit has been carried out, the killers eat the body of the victim.However, entries such as "Workplace Surveillance" are perhaps more worrying and closer to home for most people, what with the logging of telephone calls, monitoring of e-mails and computer terminals and so on, and as Mick says 'The question has to be asked - when we go to work for an individual or corporation, do we give up all rights to privacy?'. Ultimately though, the few examples from Conspiracies... cited here cannot really do justice to such a wide range of 'surreal theories, dangerous questions, and disturbing opinions', not to mention the humorous diversions which have been thrown in. Being an encyclopedic, A-Z format with cross-referenced and subject coded entries makes it easy to read and navigate. However, this format means that entries are not always extensively detailed, but they are still informative enough to give the reader a taste of the subject, and with a three page bibliography listing books, web-sites, and periodicals the book provides enough information to carry out any serious follow up reading or research. On the whole a very comprehensive book on all things conspiratorial and X-Files-ish. As the back cover blurb says 'It catalogues some of the strangest news, real or imagined, yet in print'. So, if after reading this book you still don't feel slightly jumpy or in the least paranoid, then who the hell are you working for? Oh! And one more thing, listed under the phone taps entry is a quote lifted from a New York City pay phone - 'Don't call that 800 number that tells you if your phone's tapped. They'll tap your phone'. RD May 2001 |
| Other Info/Author's Comments | An interview with Mick Farren in wholelifetimes.com |
| Availability | Second-hand
copies fairly plentiful.
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Conspiracies, Lies and Hidden Agendas at Bookfinder |